Fear.

“I was constantly afraid that God was holding out two options & asking me to choose the better one.”

 

I think we either lean in close and risk it all or we stay ruled by the fear of losing” -pg 168

 

In June I read “Come Matter Here” by Hannah Brencher. She talks a lot about the fear and anxiety that comes with change or the prospect of change.  Maybe you can relate to thinking of all the reasons something could never work out or why the thing you’re dreaming for could never really happen. Or the fear that overtakes you when what you hoped for begins to happen and you freeze, asking “Wait. Is this really what I wanted?”

Jesus has just been reminding me to listen to His voice & let truth silence the lies. He has a story so much greater for you: don’t let fear steal it.

“There is so much good in sticking with something and not giving up. I hope you learn that faith isn’t a thing to check off a list; it’s a lifelong pursuit. Don’t run from this stuff; run towards it with everything you have. While I don’t hope that something comes along to break your heart I know it inevitably will.  And so, when the storm kits and the darkness tries to win I hope you remember that your spirit is made of something thick and durable. You’re a fighter, and no one gets to take that from you. That darkness doesn’t get to have you. I hope you never get too scared to speak out your story. Your story isn’t a burden; it’s a healing balm.. May God use it to fix and restore; encourage and revive." -H.B. pg 232

 

If we are not renewing our minds in the truth of God’s Word, allowing it to transform us, we will continue in the same comfortable, unhealthy patterns.

 

Usher in hope where fear wants to stand.” - H.B. pg 47

 

I recently read John chapter 3 when Jesus is talking to Nicodemus; in their conversation Jesus repeatedly says, “I tell you the truth.” Jesus is challenging everything Nicodemus knew or presupposed about Him but ultimately it comes down to a choice for Nicodemus: he could fall back on what he had always known and reject Jesus’ words or choose to believe the truth about Jesus and follow Him.

 

“Life isn’t about the destinations  we can boast about getting to; it’s about all the walking in between that feels pointless when you try to take a picture of it because no one will understand it like you do. It’s the in between stuff that fleshes out a story: gives it guts and transformation.” -H.B. pg 31

 

Everyday I am faced with the same decision: Will I allow the same lie to play over in my mind on repeat? Will I turn back to fear because it’s what I’ve done all along and the prospect of change is scary?

 

“Maybe you’ve been in my spot before...It’s the moment when you had really high expectations for something and it just didn’t work out the way you thought it would. You did your best, but you feel like God has other plans and maybe you weren’t prepared for that. I am learning that God doesn’t bring us places to meet our expectations. For Him, it’s a lot more about transformation.” -H.B. pg 71

 

No matter the lie fear is telling me & no matter how I feel, who Jesus is does not and will not change. I have the choice to listen to His voice, renew my mind in the truth, and let Him remind me of who He is and who He created me to be.  And I pray you will choose the same.

 

“For years, I was consumed by what it would mean to “matter” in this world. To people. To someone special. To God.

I think we’ve all felt that. We want to know that our lives matter, that this isn’t some crazy accident we all got stuck inside of. I started to chase after whatever the world told me mattered. Success. Acclaim. Love. Happiness. I became obsessed with this idea of “getting there,” wherever “there” was. I was in a constant state of waiting to arrive somewhere better.

I didn’t know yet that all the good things—like faith, love, trust—don’t happen overnight. You can’t pick them up from the drive-thru or snag them in an instant download. It’s easier to run after the next thing the world tells you matters. It’s easier to never do the hard work of planting your roots or letting people in as you grab your suitcase and run hard toward “the next thing.”— But when you get tired of running, there’s a better story waiting to begin. I promise, it’s better. Yet there’s a catch: you’ll just have to stick around long enough. You’ll have to dig in and do the work—the work that happens in the here and now.” -H.B. pg 16

 

“Just be here now. You are going to miss life if you keep asking me if you are in the right place.”