“Cast your burden on the Lord, & He will sustain you.” Psalm 55:22a
With all that is happening in our nation and in the hearts of people I’ve struggled with finding the words to describe this season and how my soul has felt. As I pray I’ve frequently found myself at a loss for words…there’s so much that needs prayer but all that seems to come out is: “Oh Jesus, we need You. Only You.” There’s a soul ache and heaviness that I haven’t known exactly how to process.
So as I was reading Psalm 55 and asking Jesus to help me surrender what is beyond my comprehension the word BURDEN is verse 22 stood out to me.
“That’s it. That’s what I haven’t been able to find the word for — burdened.”
So I had to examine my heart and ask: am I choosing to carry a burden that Jesus has commanded me to surrender to Him?
When faced with a burden, I have a choice: either to carry it myself and rely on my own strength OR I can choose to cast my burden on Jesus and allow HIM to carry it. And when He carries it, He also sustains me.
In order for the LORD to sustain me, I MUST cast my burden onto Him.
So I must ask the question: If I’m not casting my burden onto Jesus, then what is sustaining me?
The word sustain comes from sustenance; and when I think of sustenance I think of something that is necessary for my survival, I think of a place where I go for provision, rest, nourishment, strength, encouragement, endurance, perseverance…without sustenance I would not be able to continue because I would no longer have what is necessary.
The Hebrew definition of sustain is to contain, maintain, support, hold in, and restrain. I love the imagery that description brings. Because while the enemy seeks to destroy, unravel, rob, and divide us; Jesus is the one holding us, keeping us, and sustaining us.
So I ask myself: what am I relying on for sustenance? Myself? My strength, ability, resources & energy? Or God’s?
I want to allow the One who created me, the One who knows my needs before I do, to sustain me. He is the only One who can sustain me:
When I don’t have the answers. When it doesn’t make sense. When I don’t understand. When it’s overwhelming. When it seems hopeless. When the weight is crushing.
I’m so grateful that He’s not surprised or overwhelmed by my burdens.
Instead, He WANTS them.
If the weight of the burden you’re carrying feels like it’s gonna crush you, cast it onto the shoulders of your Almighty Heavenly Father. You were never designed to carry the weigh of it anyway.
God knew we would be burdened so He gave us verses like Psalms 55:22 and 1 Peter 5:7 says: “casting all your care [worry/anxiety] upon Him, for He cares for you.”
Jesus cares for you like no one else in the world ever will.
Don’t avoid the burden or act like you can carry it! Cast it on Him!
When I’m burdened with something I frequently have to cast it on the Lord multiple times, because too often, I pick it back up… but the word “cast” means throw, hurl, or fling. It’s not a half-hearted, light, nonchalant “toss” it’s an utterly COMPLETE & TOTAL SURRENDER with no hope of retrieval…
We can attempt to avoid the burden and the consequent exhaustion that carrying it brings… but it’s there, sooner or later you’re going to have to face it.
And then, once you face it, you will have to determine: am I going to keep carrying this and acting like I’m “strong enough” or am I going to cast it onto the Lord?
For a long time I thought of this word “casting” as an avoidance, an “easy way out,” or an “escape” of what was burdening me. But as I’ve asked Jesus (and continue to ask Him) how to cast my burdens onto Him I’m learning that casting my burden is a choice to surrender what is beyond my comprehension and control. When I cast the burden on Him it allows me to not crumble under the weight of what I cannot control so He can sustain me for what He has called me to.
The burden doesn’t change but WHO’S carrying it does. It doesn’t mean that I neglect the burden as if it doesn’t exist or excuse it, but I realize that ultimately God is the only one strong enough to carry it. I cannot hold it up myself.
And, once I grasp that, I am free to walk in His sustaining strength.
*** Earlier this week I listened to 2 podcast episodes called “Made for Home” and “The Risky & Free Safe-Place” by Kristen Morris on the “Good Things Run Wild” podcast. I wanted to give her credit because what she shared inspired me to think a lot about what home means to me, especially in light of Mother’s Day… ***
“If I cannot give my children a perfect mother I can at least give them more of the one they’ve got; and make that one more loving. I will be available. I will take time to listen, time to play, time to be home when they arrive from school, time to counsel & encourage.” – Ruth Graham
MOM: It’s a title that I didn’t think twice about when I was little… My mom was the person who I knew could always help, always fix, always make my day better, and always make me smile. Seeing through my younger eyes, mom seemed to balance everything perfectly and walk through our days with such grace and ease. But as I’ve grown up and have witnessed all the roles and responsibility that the title “MOM” encompasses I am in awe of all my mom has fought for, forsaken, risked, created, loved, and cared for. I am more aware of hardship, struggle, and heartbreak that comes with motherhood; but I’ve continued to watch her trust the Lord and follow Him. I’ve seen your vulnerability, your transparency, your tears, and your honesty over the unexpected twists and turns in life… … But it has all caused me to love and admire you more.
In today’s society sometimes home or being a “homemaker” is viewed as safe, cautious, and even unattractive in the eyes of those pouring everything into a career, wealth, recognition, and popularity. In comparison to those things, “home,” homemaking, & motherhood are often viewed as a settling, a compromise, or a lesser calling. But, when I think of HOME, I think of everything that means most to me. I think of the place where we risk the most and love the most. The place where you don’t have to be afraid to cry. The place where you argue but know that you’re safe. The place where you see each other’s shortcomings. Home is a sort of training ground: a place to make mistakes, to fall and get back up. A place of “I’m sorry,” “please forgive me,” and “Can we try again?” A place to extend the most grace and practice the most patience.
Home is not perfect. Home is hard & messy. But it is also a worthy fight. A place where struggle and redemption can be seen.
More than anything, I think motherhood speaks of: faithfulness, consistency, selflessness diligence, & steadfastness.
I always knew, and still know, that I could always turn to my mom: when I was little I’d call for you to help me find a missing shirt, fix a broken toy, pronounce a word I couldn’t sound-out, or solve a hard math problem… Now, I turn to you for counsel, prayer, a hug, or encouragement.
Thank you for all you & daddy have poured into creating a home for us: one where we loved, learned, and laughed. When something was hard you & dad always encouraged me to persevere because you knew it would make me stronger in the end. Thank you for all you’ve sacrificed and for all you’ve invested in me.
You always viewed motherhood as a blessing, a privilege, a great gift and a treasure. You saw the opportunity and ability to mold, shape, and direct the lives of your children as the greatest gift and honor.
Because of you I’ve learned that even the most mundane tasks like cleaning, dishes, laundry, cooking, shopping, kissing scraped knees, wiping tears, helping, playing, and teaching can be acts of worship and have the power to change the world. Because:
“WHEN YOU IMPACT ONE PERSON YOU MAY NOT CHANGE THE WORLD, BUT YOU CHANGE THEIR WORLD.”
And what is of more worth than impacting a life?
Thank you mom, for all you are. I love you.
“If our children have the background of a godly, happy home & this unshakable faith that the Bible is indeed the Word of God, they will have a foundation that the forces of hell cannot shake.” – Ruth Graham
“My job is to take care of the possible & to trust God with the impossible.”
I just finished reading “The God I Love” which is an autobiography of the life of Joni Eareckson Tada. It is SUCH a good book. *spoilers ahead* If you’re not familiar with Joni’s story, here’s a quick background: she grew up in Maryland on an expansive farm where she was very active, always riding horses, swimming, and enjoying the outdoors. At the age of 17 she was at the lake with her sister and as she was diving into the water, hit her head on a rock. Tragically, as a result, Joni was paralyzed from the neck down.
She is incredibly honest about the struggle and immense wrestling she dealt with after her accident. She spent months and months in a hospital bed, undergoing surgeries and therapies, drowning in deep depression and in anguish thinking about the things she would no longer be able to do and the dreams she had that would never come to pass.
“[As I lay in my hospital bed] Panic seized me. ‘Please, I can’t live like a prisoner. I can’t live this way. … I have no hope, I have no hope, I have no hope.’ I [Joni] repeated. ‘You have to be up there; somebody better be up there…and You must, I know You must, care.’ ” pg. 180 & 181
“Half my problems in accepting life was watching my past wither and die as time wedged itself between my memories and me.” pg. 202
Joni shares how she prayed, begged, & believed for healing from paralysis and held onto scriptures like the one of the Jesus healing the man who was an invalid at the pool of Bethesda. Joni shares the disappointment and confusion she dealt with when the healing she prayed for didn’t come. As she continued to plead with the Lord for an answer she shares how the Lord has met her time and time again, comforting her, not dismissing her because of her doubts, but embracing her and leading her into deeper faith and trust amidst the suffering:
“Something was happening to me. I was caught up in God’s thoughts about me, not my thoughts about Him. I was lying in a stream of sunshine, consumed by His compassion for me, not by my anger and doubt about Him. My thoughts didn’t even matter now, only His did. Only His mind, His heart. And His mind and heart were communicating clearly: ‘Come unto Me, Let Me give you rest.’ Yes, yes. I need rest. I just want rest. Rest & peace.” pg. 183
Joni shares about her niece Kelly who, at 6-years old, was diagnosed with cancer. After an extensive surgery, Kelly was left partially paralyzed, leaving her wheelchair bound like her Aunt Joni. Joni says, “there were now 2 wheelchairs at the table: mine, adult sized and Kelly’s miniature one.” (pg. 203) One day Kelly looks up at Joni and lightheartedly remarks: “I like your wheelchair Aunt Joni! …I want one like yours when I grow up.” (pg 204) “I gulped hard,” Joni remembers: “[Kelly] didn’t seem to have a clue about the price one actually pays to join such a ‘club.’ She seemed to discount the pain, disappointment, and broken dreams. She utterly disregarded the dark side. To her, it wasn’t even worth considering.” (pg. 204)
“I was still bogged down by broken dreams. I still struggled with the dark side, that I didn’t quite know how to accept where I sat. Kelly’s sufferings had pushed her into the arms of Jesusand her gracious, openhearted way of embracing His will had cracked open heaven’s floodgates of blessing.” pg. 205
When Kelly went home to be with Jesus, Joni writes about reflecting on Kelly’s life and heaven:
“I had always acknowledged that heaven was a part of what it meant to be a Christian. Yet it had existed only a a part of the culture of my faith, more of a mental understanding than an actual realm that encroached on the present, infusing its power and hope into everything. I wanted greater faith, the kind described in Hebrews: Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. I wanted to be sure. To be hopeful. To be certain of something I couldn’t see. I needed faith that large to accept life in a wheelchair, to be enrolled in the fellowship of Christ’s suffering. My wheelchair was my chance to identify with Christ.” pg. 207
At one point in the book Joni is wrestling with the question that I believe we’ve all asked in one form or another: “Do things happen by chance?” Joni asks her Bible study leader, Steve: “Was my accident just that; an accident?” And I absolutely love the answer that he gives:
“Well Joni, let me ask you this: Do you think it was God’s will for Jesus to suffer? Think about this: it was Satan who entered Judas when he betrayed Jesus, surely the devil was behind the drunken soldiers beating Jesus and pulling out His beard. What about the mob that screamed for His blood? How can any of those be God’s will? Treason. Injustice. Torture. Murder. And yet, when we say that the cross was all a part of God’s plan, we forget that it included evil things like these. Acts 4:28 says ‘They (meaning Judas, Pilate, the mob, and the rest) did what Your power and will had decided beforehand should happen.‘ God didn’t take His hand off the wheel for one moment. He permits things He hates — really hates — to accomplish something He loves. The world’s worst murder became the world’s only salvation.” pg. 218
” ‘Joni, don’t regret that you prayed to get closer to God,’ said Steve, ‘It’s worth anything to know Him. Everything else is a loss in comparison…. Think of what your wheelchair is doing: it’s like a jackhammer breaking apart all your rocks of resistance. It’s sandblasting you to the core, obliterating all the pride and independence.’ … So often I had dared not believe that my wheelchair could be a passport to joy. Instead, I’d reigned in my hopes, bridled my heart, buckled up my thoughts and tied down my dreams. I would not let go; I would not be free. I wouldn’t release myself to believe that the joy of the Lord was big enoughto enrapture and enthrall me, despite my lifeless, limp body. ‘You will never accept your wheelchair…’ Steve told me, ‘but you can embrace God.‘ Greater faith meant, not faith in my ability to accept a wheelchair, but faith to embrace Christ and trust Him BECAUSE of my sufferings.” excerpts from pg. 208 & 209
And with that revelation of the suffering Jesus endured and the price He paid on the cross, Joni realizes:
“Here was a God who understood my suffering.” pg. 184
“True wisdom is not found in being able to figure out why God allows tragedies to happen. True wisdom is found in trusting God when you can’t figure things out.” pg. 286
“We rant and rave against God for the evil we have to endure but hardly blink at the evil on our own hearts… I knew God was requiring me to make choices. He was revealing walls in my life He wanted to tear down: pride that raised its ugly head, the temptation to rehearse successes, my still fierce competitive spirit, the constant itch to have things my way… God Himself was breaking the iron grip of iron-rule-keeping. This was the God I was beginning to fall in love with: the One whose commandments were not burdensome; the One who was changing my heart.” pg. 265 & 277
As Joni continued to trust the Lord, He began to open doors and fulfill dreams that she had surrendered long ago. She has been able to travel the world serving the Lord and others and also joined Billy Graham as a speaker at his crusades on multiple occasions. In 1982 she was married to her husband Ken.
With much patience, Joni also learned how to paint using a paintbrush in her mouth and is an incredible artist!
Joni helped begin a ministry called Joni & Friends that equips churches around the world to serve those with disabilities and they share the gospel while also providing those living with disabilities with wheelchairs, support, resources, and assistance. When she started traveling the world she began to realize the difference between the christianity she witnessed in America and the christianity she experienced in persecuted, communist, and third-world countries. This excerpt really hit home:
“In the West, we think God exists to make our lives happy, more meaningful & trouble-free. Suffering is a hateful word & we’ll do anything to eradicate, medicate, circumvent, or divorce it…. But I’ve learned that maybe the truly handicapped people are the ones who don’t need God as much… the weaker we are the harder we must lean on God, and the harder we lean on Him the stronger we discover Him to be.” pg. 299 & 302
” ‘LORD, please keep Your everlasting arms underneath me. Please give me strength to hope; not that I’ll get better but that You are enough. I need hope that you are enough.’ Jesus died on the cross for my sins; that I knew. Now I must take up my cross and die to sin. Die to any hollow, casual trust in God. Die to faithlessness, to every doubt & fear, to all anxiety and worry. To having control and assuming that my trials should fit neatly into my planner, that God should space them out in moderate doses. Die to my pride and self-sufficiency, to self-resourcefulness, and self-reliance. Die to self: me, me, me, me.” pg. 315
"The truly handicapped among us are those who start their mornings on automatic cruise control, without needing God. But He gives strength to all who cry to Him for help. So, who are the weak & needy? Who are those who need His help? It's you. It's me." pg. 352
“The God I Love” was released in 2003 and was written during a time when the world was reeling after the terrorist attacks of September 11th, 2001. Reading it now, in 2020, Joni’s description of the world as being “vulnerable, fragile, and unsafe” sounded so familiar with the pandemic happening around us today. The desperation in our world hasn’t changed, and more than ever people are searching for a foundation that does not shake. In Jesus we have hope, joy, and peace amidst suffering.
"Never have the lines between the forces of darkness and light, of good and evil, seemed so clear. Never has the world, battered and bruised as it is, seemed so vulnerable, so fragile. So unsafe." pg. 354
As I’ve read about Joni’s life the verse that comes to mind is 2 Corinthians 4:16-18:
“Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory.”
There’s an infectious joy, peace, and love that Joni exudes when she writes and shares. She talks about Jesus like He’s her best friend, because He is. She ends the book with these 2 quotes:
“LORD, Your ‘no’ answer to physical healing meant ‘yes’ to a deeper healing; a better one. Your answer has bound me to other believers and taught me so much about myself. It’s purged sin from my life, it’s strengthened my commitment to You, & caused me to depend on Your grace. Your wiser, deeper answer has stretched my hope, refined my faith, and helped me to know You better. And You are good. You are so good… I know I wouldn’t love, trust, or know You; were it not for this wheelchair.” pg. 356
“I thank Him for the wiser choice, the better answer, the harder yet richer path… This is the God I love: the Peacemaker, Answer to all our deepest longings, Answer to all our fears, Man of Sorrows and Lord of joy, always permitting what He hates to accomplish something He loves. He has brought me here so I can declare that: ‘Yes. There are more important things in life than walking.’ ” pg. 357
“In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Phil 4:13
We’ve all heard that verse a million times right?? People frequently use it to find motivation & inspiration: to do something hard or start something scary. It’s a “nice verse” to put on a T-shirt or coffee mug.
We all want “strength” for “all things” right?!? Who wouldn’t?!
But when I read this verse in context it gives a very different picture than my usual understanding of this verse… in the verses prior Paul says:
"I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content.
I know how to be brought low & I know how to abound.
In any & every circumstance,
I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger,
abundance & need."
Phil 4:11b-12
So wait a minute… Paul is talking about being CONTENT in all circumstances:
Content in humiliation.
Content in hunger.
Content in need.
And he completes this thought by saying “I CAN do ALL things THROUGH CHRIST who strengthens me.”
As I look at the life Paul it was NOT one of ease or comfort. Just read 2 Corinthians 11:23-31 for an overview of the sufferings he faced which include imprisonment, beatings, stoned, shipwrecked…and the list goes on!
As I look at Paul’s life it was defined by surrender, strength in the Lord & a deep contentment with God’s will for his life. And when I examine my own heart it causes me to ask the Lord to give me strength to rest & trust in Him amidst difficulty and suffering. I see that it’s ssooo easy for me to rely on my own strength for things that I want to do or even to do good things; like ministry! I can muster up strength to push through & persevere through many things, even while under the pretense of doing it “in the Lord’s strength,” but one of the greatest tests as to whether or not I’m relying on the Lord’s strength is when something unexpected happens. . . something that is beyond my control and far out of my ability to change. In moments of stress or frustration the Lord reveals who I’m really relying on: myself or Him.
That is why suffering plays such a necessary role in the life of the believer: Jesus never promised to spare us from suffering, but He has given us His Holy Spirit to TRANSFORM us THRU suffering. Have you realized that those in the Bible who God mightily worked through always endured great affliction? It’s because Jesus purifies & refines us in trials. Paul speaks of this in 2 Corinthians 4:16-17: “Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory…”
We know life is frail and that everything that is on this earth is delicate and temporal but it’s also easy to live like we’ve forgotten that. . . sometimes it takes a crisis, or a pandemic, for us to remember & refocus. To realize that I’ve never had any strength and that any power I think I had was really only an illusion, I had deceived myself into believing I was in control. The reality of the gospel is that it reveals the selfishness & rebellion in my heart and brings me to the feet of Jesus where He changes my heart.
When we read that God gives us strength for all things we want to tell God what we want strength for: to get the promotion, to earn the achievement, to receive the award . . . you know, we want to have the strength to do things that are “glamorous” or “show-y.” I’m pretty much saying that I want the strength to do the things that I want so that in the end I can proclaim, “I did this through Christ’s strength! Pretty amazing huh?!”
But Paul talking about BEING CONTENT in all things: including humiliation, hunger, and need.
Woah.
But that doesn’t make me look strong or impressive, in fact, that goes against the false “gospel” that says Jesus wants you to be successful, rich, and prosperous.
But what if the desire of Jesus’ heart is for you to walk through a season of something you’d never have chosen for yourself? What if that’s how He wants to demonstrate His strength in you?
What if He’s asking you to go thru something you know is impossible because then ONLY HE will get the glory? If Jesus is truly my Lord and Savior that means He gets to decide how I will give Him glory. The walk of faith is one of worshipping God amidst the ash, before the beauty. Much like Job, in the middle of despair and grief declared: “The Lord gives & the Lord takes away: blessed be the name of the Lord.”
Jesus wants to create in us a heart that will surrender, worship, & glorify Him in all circumstances. He's looking for a vessel that's empty of itself so He can fill a heart that declares: "Lord, I want to give You glory in what You have prepared for me."
I don’t want to look back on my life one day and realize that I spent all my effort trying to stay strong while all along Jesus was trying to show me my own weakness so He could be my strength.
If Jesus faced humiliation, hunger, & need how do I expect to be spared from those things? Luke 9:58 say that Jesus had “no place to lay His head” and when we pray: “Jesus, I want to be more like You” we’d rather bypass the suffering, pain & sorrow. But the fact is that Jesus promises tribulation in John 16:33! He says: “I have said these things to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”
It’s easy for the world to have happiness, peace, & joy when everything seems care-free & easy, but the moment things go off the rails their happiness is also gone. Jesus has given us His Holy Spirit to give us the FRUIT of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22-23) AMIDST trial & suffering. He does the impossible in us because when we’re at our weakest we can rejoice that He is our strength. We, like Paul, can say: “I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me…I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Cor. 12:9-10)
“God is our refuge & strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth gives way…” -Psalm 46:1-2
