Things I’m learning – Page 7 – the lovely unexpected

“If not, He is still good.”

“If not, He is still good.”

Those are not words you utter once and go on the rest of your life believing with determined, unwavering resolve. No, those are words that must rise as your soul’s song each and everyday—no matter what you are facing—even if it’s not what you expected. Through the years, that quote has been an anthem in my heart. There have been seasons where it has been easier to accept, trust and rejoice in those words: knowing His goodness with full assurance. And there have also been seasons where I have struggled to believe them: days (weeks…years…) when I doubt and wrestle to declare His goodness through the tears and hurt.

But through it all He is still good and His goodness is not determined by my circumstances; even if it doesn’t feel good … He is still good.

The enemy and my flesh lie: causing me to doubt God’s character. Maybe you can relate, in my head it sounds like this: “How could He be good if _____ happened?” “How could He be faithful if I feel alone?” “I know I’m supposed to wait…but it’s in my power to get it and I’d rather have it now.” “How could He be good if I don’t have ______?”

“God is too good to be unkind and He is too wise to be mistaken. And when we cannot trace His hand, we must trust His heart.” — Charles Spurgeon

There have been times where I have looked at God’s commands and purpose and have believed them to be burdensome, boring, irrational, and only in place to keep me from “enjoying life”. I know in my head that God’s plan is “good” but there have been times that I, honestly, have not desired it because I believed it wouldn’t be as fulfilling, abundant, or joy-filled as my own. That is a lie and is the voice of my own pride and self-righteousness. Those belief’s have come from a misunderstanding and lack of knowledge of who God is and when I begin to have those thoughts I must remind myself of God’s word and ask Him to correct my view of Him so I can see Him more clearly and trust Him more deeply. My Father, who created me, the world, and everything in it, knows how to give good & perfect gifts: in His time and in His way. Don’t you think the One who created you and the gift would know when and how to give it? I know it is hard and will cost you follow God’s Words & walk the narrow way, but distrust of God’s plan is ultimately distrust of God Himself. “If you who are evil know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!” Matthew 7:11

“Even if You don’t,
my hope is You alone.”

Here are some lessons God has taught me along the way about His goodness, purpose & trusting Him with the unknown:

Taking your eyes off of others — your journey is not theirs. Your family, life circumstances, and future is unique and unlike any other — God designed it that way with a purpose; it is not an accident! So do not be discouraged when others seem to be getting what you desire. Embrace the journey God has designed specifically for you and rejoice in it—rejoice that your Heavenly Father writes no two stories the same!
Fix Your eyes on Jesus and set your mind on His heavenly purpose. “But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us. We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed” (2 Corinthians 4:7-9) I know that it doesn’t seem like it in the moment: when you’re alone, faced with a devastating diagnosis, buried under piles of work and a busy schedule, trying to reconcile the loss of a loved one while learning how to live again…I am reminded of Job’s words: “the Lord has given and the Lord has taken away” there will be times in life when those words feel harder to speak than ever; but through God’s grace and strength it is possible to face whatever is attempting to crush you and worship Him in the midst of the storm. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 says: “Therefore we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, yet our inner self is being renewed day by day. For our light and temporary affliction is producing for us an eternal glory that far outweighs our troubles. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal”
Cherish the season you are currently in. We tend to glamorize and daydream about every season in life except the one we are currently in. We think “how much better it will be” and set unattainable expectations; but the truth is that there are difficult parts in every season and where you are right now is full of purpose: it is necessary and preparing you for what God has for you to walk through next. Do not wish every season of life away — rather be grateful: assured that God is teaching you lessons right now that you couldn’t learn any other way. “Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:18

I pray, no matter where you are in life, that you would be able to embrace God’s plan and purpose for you—it’s not easy but He is trustworthy and you can rest assured that He is who He says He is. I pray you would be able to rejoice, celebrate and cherish Jesus and His words—that you would surrender your plans to Him. He is good and faithful to do exceedingly more than you could ever hope, imagine, or dream for yourself.

Psalm 84:11 —
“The LORD gives grace and glory;
No good thing does He withhold
from those who walk uprightly.”

Deuteronomy 10:20-21 —
“Fear the Lord your God and serve Him
Hold fast to Him.
He is your praise.”

Deuteronomy 26:11 —
“REJOICE in all the good things
the Lord your God has given to you.”

2 words I thought I’d never embrace…

There are two words that don’t come natural or easy for me to live out. Through God’s strength and grace I am constantly striving to grow in these two things that would be impossible for me to embrace without Him….What are they?

Discipline.
&
Patience.

Through the years my understanding of these has changed: when I was younger, like any other kid, I hated them… they meant I couldn’t get my way or have what I wanted. As I grew up, by my parent’s guidance, I learned to accept them as needful but I struggled because people would say things like: “Why haven’t you done ____ yet?” “Don’t you want _____?” “When are you going to _____?” It made me resent the fact that I was choosing to wait & the voice of rebellion in my heart would say: “Why don’t you just get what you want? Why wait?”

Through God’s grace I’ve learned that whatever I desire will not make me happy or give me freedom once I have it. In contrast, by waiting for God’s perfect time, one day I will be able to fully enjoy what I am waiting on. But I don’t have to wait until then to be satisfied or fulfilled. There’s nothing more joyful than going to Christ for satisfaction and letting go of the fulfillment that I thought could be found in a person, experience, outcome, possession, or desire. I have learned to say “I shall not want” because He is the One my heart was made for.

Today and I’m learning to cherish and embrace self-discipline and patience. The two go hand-in-hand: discipline requires patience & patience requires discipline. They cannot be separated. They are not easy, but I’ve been able to see the beautiful fruit in my heart, mind, and life when I choose to wait on God’s timing for what is best rather than pursing what I feel I need now. I’m a work in progress; always learning. It is a life long-journey, not a destination. But I can say that the lessons discipline and patience have taught me are priceless.

One of my favorite quotes on this subject is:

“Discipline is choosing between what you want now & what you want most.”

Self-discipline in my life looks like examining my time & thoughts and asking if I’m spending it in a way that is beneficial or destructive? Am I walking in a way that is wise, directing me towards my goals and the person God is calling me to be? A lack of self-discipline leads to self-destruction and hurting those around me. Like the quote says, having self-disciple may mean having to say “No” to something, even if it’s good, so I can say “Yes” to what is best. Self-discipline leads me to choose what is best which ultimately leads to greater freedom. I’m free to say “No” because my flesh no longer has power over me and through Christ’s victory I am free to say “Yes” to what He has prepared for me: a life of joy and peace, love and freedom in Himself.

Discipline and patience are painful to practice because they stretch & pull you out of your comfort zone but lead to growth and character. It’s a daily, intentional decision to choose what causes growth…You may be questioning if staying & growing in patience and discipline is worth it. I love what Hannah Brencher, an author and speaker who shares a lot on this subject, says: “We don’t just walk away and call it quits when stuff gets hard. Life is hard. Life will deal you some tough blows. The hard stuff produces character and I know I could always stand to have more character. So I stay.”

James 1:4 reads – Learn well how to wait so you will be strong, complete, and in need of nothing. If you do not have wisdom, ask God for it. He is always ready to give it to you and will never say you are wrong for asking.

My prayer is that we learn to wait well & enjoy the season we are each in with contentment and joy. I pray God grant us the grace to stay in the hard, uncomfortable places that lead to growth. I pray He give us the wisdom and grace to practice self-discipline and patience. I pray we depend on Him for strength and follow His voice: calling us to wait and trust Him because He knows what is best.

A Break from the Pull

At the beginning of the New Year do you ever feel pulled a million ways? Like there are multiple directions you feel pressured to go yet not sure what "goals" you want to pursue?  And yet you feel discouraged because your past "resolutions" have failed to result in real change?

Can I encourage you to break away from the pull & be still so you can pursue God’s heart today? That is a daily pursuit: not one that only happens January 1st. I struggle with “year resolutions”…I’d rather simply have a resolution for today: a resolution to pursue Jesus today and to be faithful in the small things He has placed in front of me. One day at a time. And as I seek to pursue Jesus and silence the distractions around me what always leaves me in awe is that He never stops pursuing me.

At the end of one year and the beginning of the next I always find myself reflecting on what happened the last 365 days & looking expectantly towards the next. Going into 2018 I was looking at how I have been spending my time and the places in my life and heart that I’ve neglected. I found myself asking: is there something enslaving my heart or mind? Is there something that I feel I cannot live without? Something keeping me from what is most important?

And I knew: I had been wasting the most time scrolling thru my phone.

Going into the New Year the best way for me to refocus was to delete my social media apps for 2 weeks. As a result I learned that when you walk away from something, you realize the hold it had. When it is no longer there for you to turn to, you feel how strong a pull it had in your life. But then I also realized the freedom it allowed me to have in other areas in my life…liberty to pursue what I value most, places that had fallen to the wayside.

I learned that it’s not about resolutions but about realizing those things that are enslaving me and keeping me from freedom.

This verses has been resonating with me:

Galatians 5:1 – “It is for freedom that we are set free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.”

Is there a place in your life where you long to experience freedom but feel is not possible? Christ died to bring freedom to our souls, to break the chains that bind us and free us from our own flesh. Before, I was a slave to follow every dictate of my heart; now, when I begin to find myself enslaved by anything, I remind myself: Jesus died for this. Through Jesus I have victory over this. Jesus died for my freedom and I don’t want to settle for anything less.

What is pulling for your attention? If you feel too weak to break away ask the Holy Spirit for strength and depend on Him. Going into 2018 I want to stand in the liberty Christ died to secure for me. I want to be free of resolutions. I want to be free of the guilt and shame I put on myself when I fail. I want to be free of comparison. I want to be more aware of how I spend my time and put boundaries around those things that I tend to aimlessly turn to for distraction. Most importantly I want to be free to live intentionally & pursue Christ’s call.

* I read this devotional December 27th & it was a real encouragement to me, I hope it encourages you: “What is your Aim?”

In the Midst of Change

“I did my very best to put into practice all I had believed on paper.” – Katie Davis

What has God been calling me to put into practice?

Its natural for me to write about what I know I need to do…but putting the pen down, walking away, and living those words is hard. Forgiveness, kindness, vulnerability, brokenness, compassion, sacrifice, self denial, and patience are all things He’s calling me to walk in—they are easy to write about and hard to walk out.

I’ve learned a lot and have much to learn. 2017 has taught me a lot about myself; how I deal under pressure and react. Some days have been ugly, scary, and messy…where I don’t want to trust again, where I know I’m not walking in God’s will, and am not living in Jesus’ victory or in the strength of His Spirit.

It’s easy to become secluded, bitter, or resentful in times of change and transition. Whether the change is good or bad, our natural tendency is to compare it with the past and build walls because “it’ll never be the same” or “they’ll never know or love me like ____.” It’s easy to reflect so much on the past that it paralyzes you from moving forward.

I don’t want to be paralyzed. I want to walk into each new day with open hands, grateful for the past and the lessons it taught me but looking forward to where God is leading. Even the things in my past that I wouldn’t have wished for carry so much purpose. I long to walk in wisdom; holding onto lessons the past has taught me and letting go of what is not healthy or in His plan for me.

It’s easy to be swayed by my emotions or allow myself to be dictated by other’s actions. I have a choice in how I move forward and don’t want to be a victim of the past; God has called me to more than that. And He has called you to that too.

I pray that no matter what heart break or devastation is in your past or present that you would know, with full assurance and confidence, that your past does not define you and you do not need to have it all together.

When undergoing a major change it’s easy to form to habits and begin new routines simply out of survival and reaction to what has happened. But instead of survival and reaction I want this season of unexpected changes to be defined by intention, gratitude, and joy. That will only come when my eyes are fixed on Jesus. He is my goal and I am in desperate need of His grace because I fall short daily and need His Spirit in me to walk hopeful and expectant into the future. There are days in the midst of change that it pains my heart to reflect on seasons of life that are no more, but God is showing me to simply be grateful and expectant. I’m learning to rest in hope and live in peace today knowing that each new season has been predestined, designed by my loving Father, and I desire to walk in His goodness here.