Two months ago, on May 17th, I moved out of my first (rented) home. For two and a half years I called it home and grew so much over that time. I was 28 when I moved in and now am 31. Those walls hold so many memories of living on my own for the first time: I celebrated turning 29 with some of my closest friends around the dining room table. Became friends with the amazing girls I got to call roommates. Hosted movie nights. Celebrated my close friend Amisha’s bachelorette party in the living room. Dinners with Emilio and watched YouTube videos or listened to music after. Ate tacos and watched shows with Liv & Josh. Spent nights with Delise, Brittany, Natalie in my small bedroom with the addition of a twin-size air mattress on the floor. Meals cooked and enjoyed on the porch. Many walks around the neighborhood and to Sola. Cozy nights with a candle lit, listening to music.
It’s not necessarily that I was sad to leave the *house* (although I love so much about it)—what made me most emotional was knowing that I was walking away from a very specific chapter in my life of ‘firsts,’ yet excited to walk into a new chapter.
Moving out was something I had waited a while for cause I really appreciated the time I had living with my family. I’m grateful for the timeline although some may call it “late,” and it has certainly felt that way at times. I’ve learned waiting and patience throughout so much of my life— those two things have bore so much fruit and caused me to cherish God’s provision through each answered prayer. There’s so much peace knowing that God is orchestrating events behind the scenes, even when I question His timing or what He is doing.
So in May I packed up my things, moved in with my Aunt and Uncle and got ready to step into my next adventure. Since 2021 I have spent a lot of time traveling, going on group trips, trips with friends, trips to other countries and seeing more of my county and the world. With that, I’ve always wanted to spend an extended time abroad to get a taste of living in another country. The beginning of this year I started putting my belongings in storage and preparing to call Denmark, a country I had never visited, home for almost 11 weeks this summer. I didn’t have a lot planned but slowly started researching and making arrangements to figure out how I could live/stay there for that long.
As I write this, from a cafe in Copenhagen, I can’t believe I’m here. And I couldn’t of gotten here by myself, the support from my family and friends has truly been so overwhelming.
I’m not saying that what I’m experiencing is a unique or uncommon experience; I know so many people who have moved away from home in their 20’s to create a new life in a new city/state/country—those stories have always inspired & amazed me. I’ve been the girl who did college locally, stayed in my city & planted my roots close to home (something I still wouldn’t trade).
But, since turning 30, my perspective about risk and change has shifted a lot. For a long time change felt daunting, uncertain and overwhelming. In my early 20’s a lot of change happened that was out of my control which made me want to hold on tighter to things I could control. Disclaimer: that’s not a healthy coping mechanism haha (I also think some of my tendencies to be risk averse and desire control also stems from being the oldest child/eldest daughter…still working on that haha)
Now, as time has passed, I’ve accepted that change is a very necessary, unavoidable part of life. Whether the change is positive or negative, it is an opportunity to grow in a new set of circumstances and challenges. God uses change to propel us into something that wasn’t possible before, to grow and change us.
It’s often the anticipation and build up before a big change where I usually tend to overthink and get a little anxious. Where I hesitate and get a pit in my stomach that asks “What are you doing? Are you sure about this? Is this a good idea?”
Getting out of my comfort zone, doing hard things, traveling, and taking more risks has reminded me that I love problem solving, adjusting to a new surroundings, new routines and trying new things. It feels more
More than ever I’ve realized that I would rather try and fail than look back on my life and regret not taking more risks when I had the chance. I know it’s so cliche but it’s true. Life is short & I don’t want to spend it in my comfort zone, wondering what would’ve happened if I had trusted the Lord more or chased the dreams that were in my heart. I’d rather trust the Lord with change in my life and surrender my anxieties to Him than stay in my comfort zone where everything is predicable.
For too long I had an inaccurate view of God’s will where I was scared that one wrong move or wrong decision could ruin everything. That came from such an inaccurate view of God’s heart and what His will actually is. So much of God’s will in scripture has to do with how we live:
Am I giving thanks? (1 thessalonians 5:18)
Am I prayerful? (colossians 4:2)
Am I seeking Him in faith? (hebrews 11:6)
Am I waiting on Him? (psalm 27:14)
Am I joyful in hope? (romans 12:12)
Am I trusting Him? (proverbs 3:5)
Am I resting in Him? (matthew 11:28)
Am I abiding in Him? (john 15:4)
Am I walking in the Spirit & bearing fruit? (galatians 5:22-23)
Those are just a few verses but for the believer, this is God’s will for us matter your job title, relationship status, or season you’re in.
What gifts and dreams do you have? Those are an accident! God placed those in your heart with a plan and a purpose to glorify Him in the way He created you! He is so sovereign that if you are going in a direction that isn’t for you He will make it clear and close doors. We can plan our way while trusting that God is going before directing our steps (Proverbs 16:9). There is nothing more freeing or exciting than finding out the good works He has in store and discovering more of why He made you with the passions, gifts and dreams you have (Ephesians 2:10). “I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for good and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11
Don’t let fear hold you back. “Do not fear” is one of the most repeated phrases in the Bible — I think that’s because God knows it holds us back from so much. 1 John 4:8 says “There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear…the person who is afraid has not been made perfect in love.” My prayer lately is that God’s love would continue to drive out fear in me.
Here’s to embracing change, taking small steps of faith, trusting Him, letting go of fear and taking risks. Don’t let uncertainty hold you back. Take the leap and leave the results in God’s hands. Give yourself permission to change your mind and try something new. Life is literally a vapor, it’s so short—make the most of where you are while you wait patiently on the Lord for where He’s bringing you next. God is bringing you somewhere and making you into someone beyond your understanding or comprehension. Trust Him and take the risk: there are no better arms to fall into <3
“to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us” Ephesians 3:20
